Ur...

This is it. My last night in my own place. I keep expecting to have really strong emotions - but they aren't coming. I feel tired. I took off from work both today and tomorrow so that I would have time to pack and clean prior to heading into the weekend. I'm working both Saturday and Sunday.

In an effort to process what this evening actually means - I pulled out my journal from the summer/fall of 2006. The pages covering July through September told me this:

1) I had decided it was possibly time to leave the place I had been living/working since graduating from college.

2) I applied for an awesome job in Dallas and then turned it down even before they offered it to me.

3) I started to wonder what the future could possibly hold. (If you had offered me $1,000 to guess which state I would be moving to in a matter of months I'm close to 100% sure I would not have said Arizona.)

4) I was going through Beth Moore's Patriarch study and finding myself identifying with Abram.

5) September 5th I found the job where I currently work and sent my resume. I had never, ever considered living in Arizona prior to that moment. Even then... I didn't really think I would do it.

Here's what I wrote four years ago this week:

__________

8/23/06

As I think about where my road may be leading me, I am reminded specifically of Abram. The Lord called him to leave it all and come into the desert. I examine my own comfortable suburban life and wonder if I am willing to leave. Will I really pack it up as eagerly as I make it seem? I think I am ready. Good-bye Ur, hello desert. The desert is hot and flat and I have no idea where we are going. But I'm excited because my story is not the same as Abram's. We are not going to Canaan... but God's promise to finish his work in his people applies just as much to me as it does to Abram.

P.S. Don't miss out on the journey by being so caught up on the final destination. This may be your only time on a camel - so open your eyes to the story. Allow His story to saturate your story and you will end up in the most dangerous place possible... His will.

_______

I had no idea when I wrote that how quickly I would have to live those words. I am so thankful for this time of independence... this time of dependence. My emotion tonight is landing right where I started. "I think I am ready... but hey... don't be so caught up in the destination 51 days from now that you forget to enjoy this journey!"